ROSALINE: 3 STARS
“Rosaline,” a new romantic comedy based on “Romeo and Juliet,” alters the dynamics of William Shakespeare's play by flipping the script to focus on Rosaline (Kaitlyn Dever), Romeo Montague's ex-girlfriend. “The greatest story ever told,” she says, “was missing a chapter. Mine.”
Based on Rebecca Serle’s young adult novel “When You Were Mine,” which was inspired by Shakespeare's romantic tragedy, the Disney+ movie sees Kaitlyn Dever play a character who is mentioned but never seen in the original play. She is Rosaline, Romeo’s (Kyle Allen) girlfriend, at least she is until her cousin, Juliet Capulet (Isabela Merced) shows up.
Turns out Romeo uses his trademarked flowery romantic language to seduce Juliet. “I’m afraid you’re not the first maiden he’s charmed with his high cheekbones and fancy words,” says Rosaline.
Distraught, Rosaline is determined to break them up, and win back her man, even as a possible new romance with Dario (Sean Teale) brews. “Romeo and Juliet,” she snorts, “It doesn’t even sound right.”
These times of woe afford no time to woo, indeed.
Like “A Knight’s Tale” or the recent “Catherine Called Birdy,” “Rosaline” is a medieval period piece presented with modern sensibilities and idioms. The iconic balcony scene, for instance, is there, but tweaked for laughs, and at one point the morose Rosaline uses cholera as an excuse to not get out of bed.
Even the play’s famous ending has been spun. No spoilers here, but it should be noted that “Rosaline” isn’t exactly a romance and it isn’t a tragedy. It’s more a heartbroken journey of empowerment and self-discovery.
It doesn’t all work. The story slows in the middle, and, for older viewers, the high school romance aspects may get old quickly, but at the heart of the story is Dever. As the title character she is both vindictive and vulnerable, a young woman with an attitude and a big beating heart. Her recent work, heavier turns in the film “Dear Evan Hanson” and TV dramas like “Dopesick” and “Unbelievable,” haven’t showcased her comedic talents, but “Rosaline” gives her the opportunity to stand out in the midst of the movie’s screwball co-incidences and farcical aspects.
Strong work from Bradley Whitford as Friar Laurence—who scolds his daughter with, “You are a woman. You’re not supposed to talk about what you want!”—and “Good Will Hunting's “Minnie Driver as the outspoken Nurse, round out the cast.
“Rosaline” is no “Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead.” Tom Stoppard’s absurdist, existential tragicomic “Hamlet” riff examines the mystery of life. “Rosaline” sets its sights lower. It is a high school romance in a corset that should work for fans of “Romeo and Juliet,” the Coles Notes version.
TRIANGLE OF SADNESS: 3 STARS
There is nothing subtle in “Triangle of Sadness,” Swedish filmmaker Ruben Östlund’s over-the-top tale of hypocrisy, greed, and ambition, now playing in theatres.
Divided into three sections, it begins with an examination of the dynamic between men and women, in the form of supermodels Carl (Harris Dickinson) and Yaya (Charlbi Dean, who passed away at age 32 in August). At dinner they fight over the bill when she makes no effort to pony up cash, even though she makes much more money than he does. In their superficial world, the real currencies are good looks and social media followers, she thinks, but he feels if they are to truly be equals, they mustn’t let money come between them, with one lording their wealth over the other.
The second, must-be-seen-to-be-believed, sequence is social satire of the highest and grisliest order. Set aboard a luxury yacht, Carl and Yaya, invited because they are well-known, beautiful people, are joined by a rogue’s gallery of ultra-rich folks used to flaunting their privilege. “The success of a luxury cruise mainly depends on you,” says staff leader Paula (Vicki Berlin) to her team. “I don’t want to hear anybody saying, ‘No.’ It’s always, ‘Yes sir! Yes ma’am!’”
At the helm is Captain Thomas Smith (Woody Harrelson), a drunken American communist, who deliberately schedules the fancy Captain’s Dinner during a patch of very rough weather. As the waves rock the ship, the motion of the ocean coupled with some spoiled seafood, lead to mass sea sickness, and a ballet of bodily fluids.
Both sections dovetail into an apocalyptic third sequence that examines social hierarchies, and what can happen when the powerless get a taste of control.
There is nothing subtle in this over-the-top tale of ambition, power and entitlement. The social satire is as delicate as a punch to the jaw and is not for the faint of heart, but not simply because the satire cuts so deep.
The middle section, the captain’s dinner sequence, turns into a burlesque of barf so vivid it makes the Mr. Creosote sequence from “Monty Python's The Meaning of Life” seem restrained. Rarely have bodily fluids been so celebrated on screen. It’s a lot, and its message that these wealthy folks are messy, gross humans, is not subtle, but you have to admire Östlund’s commitment to the bit.
Heavy handed as it may be, “Triangle of Sadness” is a singular film. An audacious mix of Luis Buñuel and “South Park,” although often grotesque, it entertains and provokes thought.
ACCIDENT MAN: HITMAN’S HOLIDAY: 3 STARS
“Accident Man: Hitman’s Holiday,” now on video on demand, is a sequel to a movie you probably haven’t seen, but if you enjoy silly action movies, you might want to put your brain in neutral and schedule a double bill.
Mike Fallon, played by Scott Adkins, is a hired killer with an unusual specialty. He makes his murders look like accidents. “It’s a dirty job” he says, “But I’m willing to get my hands bleeding filthy for the right price.”
Known professionally as Accident Man, when we first meet him in “Hitman’s Holiday” he’s on the scene of a rave, making the death of a DJ look like part of the show.
Looking to get out of town for a spell, until things cool down in England, he grabs a fake passport and hightails it to Malta. He loves the weather and the beer, but unfortunately, the good life is interrupted when Accident Man and his partner, Finicky Fred (Perry Benson), a designer of unusual death machines, are kidnapped by Mrs. Zuuzer (Flaminia Cinque), Malta’s top crime boss.
Her offer is a simple one, keep her son Dante (George Fouracres), who has multiple contracts out on his head, alive. If he does, then Fred will also live to see another day. “I’m not a babysitter,” he says. “I’m a professional killer,” but out of loyalty to Fred, he takes the gig.
To keep his end of the bargain, he’ll have to battle five of the world’s top assassins and possibly rekindle a relationship with Big Ray (Ray Stevenson), a former father-figure—“Imagine if the bloody Terminator was your surrogate father.”—who thinks Accident Man owes him a debt.
“Accident Man: Hitman’s Holiday” is a bit of low budget fun. A throwback to the kinds of b-action movies that played on the lower half at midnight madness screenings, it feels like either a tribute to or a satire of, Jason Statham movies. I can’t tell which it is. It contains the same kind of action man moves as Statham, but it doesn’t take itself as seriously. And it is not afraid to get gross.
The ultra-violence and stylized shooting owe a debt to not only to Statham, but also to Guy Ritchie and every movie that values hand-to-hand fisticuffs over computer generated mayhem.d
The story in “Accident Man: Hitman’s Holiday” is paper thin, the characters are caricatures—like the assassin who cannot feel pain—but it’s just colorful enough to be a bit of mindless fun
