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She set out to find a husband in a year. Then she matched with a guy on a dating app on the other side of the world

Samantha Hannah was living in New Zealand when she matched on a dating app with Toby Hunter, who was in London. Here's the couple in Hawkes Bay, New Zealand. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource) Samantha Hannah was living in New Zealand when she matched on a dating app with Toby Hunter, who was in London. Here's the couple in Hawkes Bay, New Zealand. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource)
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Samantha Hannah was travelling through Australia and New Zealand, soaking up new places and experiences, while simultaneously reflecting on her past and considering her life so far.

It was late 2017. Samantha, from Perth, Scotland, was 31. Her brother had passed away unexpectedly a couple of years previously.

鈥淚 wanted to go out and live my life as much as possible now he couldn鈥檛,鈥 Samantha tells CNN Travel.

Samantha鈥檚 brother had left her a little money.

鈥淪o I quit my job, and I spent that money on a ticket to go to Australia,鈥 says Samantha. 鈥淎nd then I moved to New Zealand for a bit and was just trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life.鈥

Samantha had always loved comedy and she鈥檇 worked the U.K. comedy circuit for a little bit in her mid-20s. Now 鈥揳s she checked into hostels and spent evenings with fellow backpackers in Aussie pubs, or hiking beautiful New Zealand scenery 鈥 Samantha kept considering, in the back of her mind, the idea of potentially returning to the stage.

But if Samantha was going to go back to comedy, she wanted to do it differently this time round. She wanted to come back with a one-hour show, one with a strong concept she believed in wholeheartedly.

In the meantime, whenever Samantha checked social media to see what was happening back home, yet another friend seemed to be announcing an engagement on Facebook. Or posting an ultrasound photo on Instagram. Or sending an excited WhatsApp message with a photo of dangling keys, in front of a newly purchased home.

Samantha was happy for all her friends, but she also marvelled at how everyone had suddenly grown up, while she was single, unemployed and travelling, with no fixed address.

Maybe I should find a husband, Samantha thought absentmindedly as she scrolled through the series of engagement photos. And suddenly, an idea for a comedy show was born.

鈥淚 thought I鈥檇 write a show called 鈥楬ow to find a husband in a year,鈥欌 says Samantha. 鈥淲hat does it look like if you actually set that as a target? It was very tongue in cheek, I wasn鈥檛 actually expecting to meet anyone.鈥

While based in New Zealand capital Wellington, Samantha downloaded dating app Tinder 鈥渁nd started saying yes to everyone.鈥 She announced her intentions on her dating profile, explaining she was writing a show and warning potential matches that 鈥渁ny Tinder interaction may be used for material.鈥

Samantha figured the more dates she went on, with as many men as possible, the more fodder she鈥檇 have for her comedy show 鈥 and, theoretically, the higher the likelihood she might find a potential husband in the fold.

Not long into her quest, Samantha swiped right on a guy called Toby. She liked that he had a picture with a dog and 鈥渓ooked like he travelled a lot.鈥

He also 鈥渟eemed like he had a personality.鈥 His bio 鈥 the little summary dating app users write about themselves 鈥 was 鈥渇unny and original.鈥

The only fly in the ointment 鈥 while this guy Toby was seemingly from New Zealand, when he matched with Samantha, he wasn鈥檛 living there.

鈥淐ongrats on your match 12000m away,鈥 Toby wrote to Samantha. 鈥淗ow鈥檚 that hubby hunting going for you?鈥

An unexpected match

Like Samantha, in late 2017 Toby Hunter was going through a transitional period. Originally from Gisborne, New Zealand, he鈥檇 grown up in Napier, gone to college in Wellington and then, in his mid-20s, moved across the world to London.

Now he was 30, recently out of a long-term relationship and unsure whether to stay in the U.K. or return home.

鈥淚 wasn鈥檛 quite sure what I was going to do at that point, whether I wanted to stay in London, move back to New Zealand,鈥 Toby tells CNN Travel. 鈥淚 spent six months in Bali, learning to surf, just trying to work it out.鈥

As he considered the future, Toby adjusted his Tinder settings to expand out of west London and include Wellington, New Zealand 鈥 partly because he worked in analytics, and was intrigued by how the Tinder algorithm worked. And partly because Toby was wondering what it might be like to be single in his old college town.

He quickly found the Wellington dating pool to be full of people he vaguely knew 鈥 friends of friends or old college acquaintances. Samantha, with her 鈥渇un, different bio鈥 announcing her comedy show plans and husband-hunting intentions, stood out.

Toby recalls Samantha鈥檚 profile also mentioning 鈥渢ravelling, and that she really liked melon.鈥

And she listed her college, which was in the U.K.

鈥淪o I guessed she was maybe English,鈥 recalls Toby. 鈥淎lso, I thought she was cute.鈥

Samantha and Toby hit it off when they matched on Tinder -- despite being on opposite sides of the world. Here they are later on, walking the Marlborough Sounds in New Zealand. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource)

As they started exchanging messages, Samantha and Toby realized that although they were on opposite sides of the world, they were each living in cities the other was very familiar with 鈥 Samantha had spent years living in London, while Toby knew Wellington well.

鈥淲e enjoyed the irony,鈥 says Samantha.

鈥淲e could also relate to what each other was up to pretty easily, which made for a good conversation,鈥 adds Toby. 鈥淪ammy was missing parts of London, I was missing parts of N.Z.鈥

That first day, they exchanged hundreds of messages back and forth. The connection 鈥 and the ease 鈥 was obvious right away.

Samantha mentioned some of her friends were coming over to join her soon, and that the group were going to travel around New Zealand. Toby instantly sent over a list of recommendations of places they should go.

Then Samantha shared funny stories of the 鈥渉orrific dates鈥 she鈥檇 endured on her husband-hunting quest. Toby sympathized 鈥 he鈥檇 been on plenty of bad dates himself.

Then, a couple of days after they鈥檇 first connected, Samantha was messaging Toby while out at a bar.

Several glasses of wine in, she decided to spontaneously call him.

鈥淚t was the first time we鈥檇 ever spoken,鈥 Samantha recalls.

She was standing outside a pub, amid crowds of drinkers, when Toby answered. His face, surprised then happy, popped up on Samantha鈥檚 phone screen. But then, almost instantaneously, a fight broke out next to Samantha and she decided to intervene and try to break it up.

鈥淪o I quite literally picked up the phone to a Scottish accent shouting, 鈥楲eave it, he鈥檚 not worth it,鈥欌 recalls Toby.

鈥淚t wasn鈥檛 a serious fight,鈥 explains Samantha. 鈥淛ust a silly scuffle. But yes, I helped break it up.鈥

Civilian duty done, Samantha turned her attention back to the video call. It wasn鈥檛 a long chat, but it was 鈥渇un鈥 to see Toby鈥檚 face, and it didn鈥檛 feel like chatting to a stranger.

As for Toby, when answered the call he鈥檇 felt 鈥渘ervous excitement.鈥 But almost immediately, chatting with Samantha became 鈥渏ust easy.鈥

Toby figured that when New Zealand morning rolled around, Samantha might be a bit hungover, so he organized a breakfast bagel to be sent to her hostel, a move she thought was 鈥渞eal smooth.鈥

And so their back and forth continued. Samantha鈥檚 friends arrived and the group started exploring New Zealand, finding themselves in Napier, the city where Toby had spent much of his childhood, and where his parents still lived.

鈥淢y parents own a fish and chip shop there,鈥 Toby told Samantha. 鈥淵ou should pop in and say hi to them.鈥

That would be a bit rogue, Samantha thought, but it might also be a fun anecdote for the comedy show. She told him they鈥檇 plan to swing by.

Meanwhile, Toby mentioned to his parents that Samantha might call into the cafe, struggling to describe who she was to him.

鈥淏ecause what were Sammy and I? It was two, three weeks deep,鈥 says Toby. 鈥淲e weren鈥檛 exactly dating. We were just chatting. Chatting a lot.鈥

In the end, he just described Samantha as a 鈥渇riend from out of town.鈥

And she was easy for Toby鈥檚 parents to spot. Samantha and her friends 鈥渟tuck out like a sore thumb鈥, as Samantha puts it.

鈥淚鈥檓 from the U.K. There鈥檚 a very different standard of dress there than in New Zealand. New Zealand鈥檚 very casual 鈥 like, you go to the fish and chip shop most people don鈥檛 have shoes on,鈥 she says.

Samantha and her friends arrived in full hair and makeup, wearing heels.

鈥淲e got very, very dressed up,鈥 she says.

Toby鈥檚 mother instantly guessed Samantha must be the friend Toby had mentioned. Toby鈥檚 father took a photo of Samantha and her friends looking quizzically at the menu. The whole thing was quite surreal, made only more so by the fact that Samantha had now met Toby鈥檚 parents before she鈥檇 actually met Toby in person.

After the stop-off in Napier, Samantha鈥檚 friends were continuing their travels, but Samantha was at a crossroads. She wanted to meet Toby in 鈥渞eal life鈥 and started considering how she could make that happen.

She didn鈥檛 necessarily think she鈥檇 achieved her husband-hunting goal, but Samantha had an inkling her connection with Toby might be something special.

Toby felt the same way. He was an analyst, someone who worked in statistics 鈥 and the statistics seemed to suggest this was a no ordinary dating app match.

鈥淲e鈥檇 been chatting a heck of a lot,鈥 he says.

Samantha and Toby moved to New Zealand in 2021. Here they are by Mount Ngauruhoe while hiking the Tongariro Crossing. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource)

Meeting in 鈥榬eal life鈥

Samantha and Toby agreed that Samantha would book a December flight to London, and they鈥檇 finally meet in person.

Toby promised to meet Samantha at the airport. Up until that point, Samantha had the idea that Toby was a very organized person 鈥 what with the myriad of New Zealand tips, and the breakfast bagel delivered to her hostel 鈥 but then she arrived at London鈥檚 Heathrow Airport and Toby was nowhere to be seen.

鈥淚 was just waiting there, like I鈥檇 been stood up, like I鈥檇 been catfished, just waiting for the MTV film crew to appear or something,鈥 she says. 鈥淎lso, I鈥檇 been on a 30-hour journey, so it was not the best.鈥

It turned out Toby hadn鈥檛 considered that the London Underground wouldn鈥檛 be running in the early morning, when Samantha landed. He frantically texted apologies and eventually got a train to the airport.

In the meantime, Samantha hit the airport bathroom 鈥渢rying to freshen up my hair and make-up and become presentable.鈥

When Toby eventually arrived at Heathrow, he was holding a two-litre bottle of Copella apple juice. When Samantha saw him, she burst out laughing.

In the lead-up to her visit, Toby had asked Samantha about the things she most missed about the U.K. Top of her list was Copella juice, an unassuming U.K. juice brand that isn鈥檛 stocked in New Zealand. When Toby was considering what to bring to the airport, the answer was a no-brainer.

鈥淚鈥檓 practical, not a flowers guy,鈥 Toby says today. 鈥淚 figured juice was a good choice.鈥

鈥淎lso, at least I knew who he was,鈥 jokes Samantha, 鈥淚鈥檓 like, 鈥極h yeah, he鈥檚 the guy with a massive juice in his hand.鈥欌

Over the next few days, Samantha 鈥 who was staying in Toby鈥檚 apartment 鈥 and Toby got to know each other in person. Toby recalls feeling 鈥渆xcited and also maybe a little confused about what was next.鈥

The first day, Toby showed Samantha his London 鈥 his favourite West London pubs and brunch spots. The second day, Samantha showed Toby her version of the city.

鈥淚 used to work for Madame Tussauds, so I got free tickets to things like the London Dungeons and so I just took him to all the attractions,鈥 says Samantha. 鈥淪o we鈥檙e doing all those sites, and lots of brunches, lots of meals.鈥

Toby and Samanta鈥檚 non-stop messaging conversation translated well into real-life conversations. They enjoyed each other鈥檚 company, talking about everything and anything.

And all in all, the two were pretty much how they expected one another to be 鈥 except Toby was 鈥渁 tiny bit taller鈥 than Samantha expected, and less organized. And Samantha was more spontaneous than Toby first realized. She was always 鈥渇ree with her thinking and planning鈥 鈥 happy to see how things went, and not account for every eventuality.

Samantha stayed with Toby for a week or so, then went to visit family in Scotland. In the meantime, Toby went skiing, had an accident and broke his leg. When Samantha returned to London, Toby was in a bad way. Without any spoken agreement between them, Samantha committed to 鈥渘urse him back to health鈥 and also keep up Toby鈥檚 spirits and help him still enjoy London life while he was in a cast.

鈥淪o we鈥檇 go around the Design Museum, and Toby would be in a wheelchair and I鈥檇 be pushing him around,鈥 recalls Samantha.

Time moved on, and Samantha didn鈥檛 return to New Zealand. Somewhere along the line, she and Toby committed to giving their relationship a proper go.

鈥淚 don鈥檛 even think we had a conversation about it,鈥 says Toby. 鈥淏ut we were spending 24/7 together.鈥

Samantha says the decision was obvious 鈥減retty much as soon as we met in real life.鈥

Toby and Samantha are looking forward to a future together. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource)

In time, Toby met Samantha鈥檚 family. Toby and Samantha introduced each other to their friends.

鈥淥ur friends were all for it and supportive,鈥 says Samantha.

鈥淭hey thought it was a pretty wild story, excited to follow along,鈥 says Toby.

Meanwhile, Toby called his parents and told them that the girl who鈥檇 arrived, over-dressed, in their fish and chip shop was now his girlfriend. They were delighted for him, their delight only slightly tempered by their horror at having charged Samantha for the fish and chips.

鈥淭o this day, Toby鈥檚 mum says that鈥檚 her biggest regret,鈥 says Samantha.

Telling the story on stage

In July 2018, Samantha performed her first preview of her show: 鈥淗ow to find a husband in a year鈥 in London. Toby was in the audience. For him, the experience was a surreal and proud moment.

鈥淲hile I knew Sammy was a funny person, I hadn鈥檛 seen her on stage,鈥 says Toby. 鈥淪he killed it, was a great laugh and funny retelling of our story.鈥

Samantha says she had no qualms about sharing details of her romance with Toby on stage.

鈥淚t just made it more fun to have a fun story attached to it,鈥 she says.

That summer, Samantha took the show to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, the prestigious Scottish comedy showcase. The eye-catching title 鈥 and great backstory 鈥 sparked a few headlines in the U.K. press, and Samantha left Edinburgh feeling proud and excited. She didn鈥檛 actually have 鈥渁 husband鈥 鈥 but she had a committed partner, a promising comedy career and the future looked bright.

The following January 2019, Samantha and Toby formally moved in together in London.

鈥淲e settled down,鈥 says Samantha. 鈥淪tarted being more like a regular couple.鈥

And then, after several years together in London, in 2021 Samantha and Toby took another leap together and relocated to New Zealand.

鈥淔or me, fundamentally, I always wanted to be back in New Zealand at some point,鈥 says Toby. 鈥淎nd Sammy was kind of brought into the New Zealand lifestyle.鈥

The couple rented a flat in Wellington with views of the ocean, and immediately felt like they鈥檇 make the right decision. Then they bought their first home.

鈥淚t鈥檚 just gorgeous,鈥 says Samantha of New Zealand. 鈥淲e鈥檙e really settled here.鈥

Last year, Samantha鈥檚 parents came out to Wellington to visit and met Toby鈥檚 parents for the first time.

鈥淭hey all get on so well, it was really cute,鈥 says Samantha. 鈥淣ow they all send each other messages, they鈥檙e Facebook friends.鈥

Building a life together

Today, Samantha鈥檚 still writing comedy. She posts updates on her work on her and she鈥檚 currently focused on preparing for the New Zealand International Comedy Festival in May.

It鈥檚 been a while since Samantha performed the show about meeting Toby 鈥 after all, it鈥檚 almost seven years since they first started messaging one another from opposite sides of the globe. How they met doesn鈥檛 seem as significant as it once did.

鈥淚t was a really fun experience for both of us,鈥 says Samantha of their unusual courtship. 鈥淎nd then it just became normal. We鈥檝e been together for six, seven years, and we鈥檝e had so many different stages that we sometimes forget that鈥檚 how we met.鈥

Still, Samantha continues to credit the show for spurring on the relationship.

Although all this said, technically Samantha still hasn鈥檛 鈥渇ound a husband.鈥 She and Toby aren鈥檛 married.

鈥淚鈥檒l let Toby answer that one,鈥 says Samantha, laughing, when asked about the couple鈥檚 perspective on marriage.

鈥淚鈥檓 sure it鈥檒l happen at some point,鈥 says Toby, also laughing.

Toby and Samantha both wanted to meet in person and finally did in December 2018. Here they are the following year, on vacation in Budapest, Hungary. (Samantha Hannah via CNN Newsource)

It鈥檚 actually become a recent gag in Samantha鈥檚 comedy that Toby hasn鈥檛 proposed, but while she enjoys joking about it and 鈥渨atching Toby have to squirm for a little bit,鈥 Samantha says her material is actually about 鈥渟ocietal pressure and how you shouldn鈥檛 have to do anything in a traditional way.鈥

鈥淭hat includes marriage,鈥 Samantha says. 鈥淎nd for us, it鈥檚 just a grown-up conversation that we鈥檒l have and we鈥檒l decide how we want to do it, if that fits into our plans.鈥

Toby says even when Samantha teases him on stage, he鈥檚 always very 鈥減roud of her when she performs.鈥

鈥淪eeing how she鈥檚 grown from smaller rooms in London to playing to audiences of more than a thousand people, it鈥檚 really cool,鈥 he says.

For Toby, watching Samantha on stage is also a moment when he reflects on how lucky he is that she came into his life.

鈥淲e鈥檙e both really lucky,鈥 adds Samantha. 鈥淲e鈥檝e got such an awesome life that we鈥檝e built so much over the last six years, together.鈥

One time, Samantha asked Toby if he could use his analytic skills to work out the statistical odds of the two of them meeting in the first place 鈥 she thought the stat might be fun to include in the show.

Toby wasn鈥檛 able to figure it out, but the question made them both ponder on the likelihood of their meeting and falling in love 鈥 how grateful they are that it happened.

鈥淟ife can change at any moment, but especially when you put yourself in new situations or outside of your comfort zone,鈥 says Toby.

鈥淟eaving my job and London to travel changed the whole course of my life,鈥 agrees Samantha. 鈥淚 now live in New Zealand with a partner I love, in a beautiful house and get to perform comedy regularly. Neither of us were super happy just before we met, but I think it鈥檚 safe to say we鈥檙e both really happy now.鈥

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